Thursday, 26 March 2009

Means and ends (on the unconspicuous usage of violence)

I get very pissed off whenever I read that some idiot went postal in town X, country Y (no, it's not always the USA) because of the evident lack of foresight of those chimps (everybody knowing that it was them the ones shooting people at the school/supermarket/post office, thus having no way out of the mess they got themselves into except death or imprisonment, usually followed by death). It's obvious that noone bothered briefing these scrapes from the bottom of the gene pool on the dos and don'ts of violence.

Shooting and killing sprees when your life is not in imminent danger are pretty much like using PowerPoint in a lecture (I don't think I have to explain this one, but just in case, stick it up your ass): cruel and counterproductive. Cruel because you're screwing a lot of people in the process and not making a profit. Counterproductive because in the Powerpoint side of the problem as well as the violent one, you're not getting your point across and you are looking like a fucking lunatic and an idiot and I'm falling asleep - permanently.

Also, for weeks after you have sprayed the pavements and walls of our beloved town (I'll just pretend I'm from town X in this example) with your brains I'll have to put up with idiots everywhere speaking about how violence is just wrong and not quite the right way to do things.

Of course violence is not the answer for everything! Almost everyone prefers to reason over arguments, but there are some brickheads you can only reason (or get them to act in a way that doesn't bother you) by inflicting pain. Vast amounts of it. And you should do it in a way that won't allow for charges to be pressed against you (I believe the bullshit term for this is "cost/result analysis"). Personally, I'd suggest a kick in the back of the knee. It can be done without drawing attention, and judging by the expression of the recipients and the time they stay on their knees it hurts a lot which should suffice to make yourself clear. Experience has shown me that while violence is not the solution for everything, it solves the most persistent ones (where words won't work) and it gives the gratification of a work well done.

OTOH, sadly, tossing a projector connected to a laptop off a window is very expensive, which detracts from the gratification it provides.

Remember kids, when it comes to violence, think before acting and don't do it a day late and way over budget!